You Can Do It Only In Summer!..
“Why would the school have immigrant teachers who can’t really tell much about American life? I’m talking about baseball, football,” – an exchange student of 15 years old was grilling me in the classroom in front of other ten anxious teenagers who came to the US mostly to experience American YOLO type of life.
My face was red, I was sweating in a conditioned room stacked with apple computers for smarts kiddos. “Why did I get this group? Why did I agree to teach this summer school?!” – I wanted to disappear into the oblivion.
That happened about four years ago. Back then, I was eager to experiment, get more money for my quickly draining bank account, and drive my Toyota 94 in the summer heat without AC.
Now I think I handled the situation like I should have, like any teacher would have done so: offered choices, games, discussions. And when all this didn’t work, I bluntly confessed to my college about struggling, and she was gracious enough to switch groups.
After that summer, I never worked in July and August ever again.
I’m in a different position now. Being a public-school teacher gives you good perks, even during summer school. You don’t need to rise to the expectations of the program that sold foreign students the excitement of the journey to America. You can be quite yourself, even as an immigrant teacher having no clue about baseball.
It’s still haunting me, honestly.
No, I never worked in summer.
Was I and am I interested? Yes, of course.
Money can never be enough for a growing family with shallow pockets. The truth is I haven’t yet had the burden of monthly mortgage payments depleting my paycheck.
I don’t have teenager children who ask for new gadgets and want to stand out in their new sneakers. I shamelessly save most of my income, take a half-summer trip back home to see my parents, brag about my life in the US and hope that the hard days of teacher Ubering and waitering will never be part of my existence.
Every time the school year is coming to an end, I ask teachers around me if it’s worth working in summer. Giving away summer for work is still in consideration. I feel like a child being forced to forget about ice-cream days and careless existence and given an assignment with a paycheck.
That’s why I ask a lot.
I ask many teachers, experienced and new. I also get so many answers. Younger teachers like me do value summer work. They talk about a nice paycheck that will probably add to their nice week vacation before the school year starts again.
Maybe, they are paying a mortgage. But most mentioned the more leisurely day, less responsibility, summer-like nature of the teaching process in a classroom. That’s sounds good to me too, but not yet good enough to make me lose my summer.
I also talk to experienced teachers. They smile first, take a minute to collect thoughts and give me the best answer that would not affect my newbie teacher attitude, “Well, it’s like babysitting the kids who don’t want to be here. Honestly…I don’t do that. It’s not worth it. I need my sanity.”
That’s not inspiring at all. The idea of having to be somewhere to make an extra buck or even scramble for your mortgage terrifies me.
I plunge into a hole of darkness and pessimism about my choice of a career.
Why can’t it be more adventurous? Why do I have to give it all? What is the sacrifice about? Why do I start having this nagging teacher’s guilt?
Shake it off …Shake it off for now…
The truth is, we tend to see the world from the perspective of our own backyard. There must be some teachers who have a ball teaching in summer. I follow some of those teachers on Instagram. I envy them shamelessly, openly.
I usually have anxiety getting to do school-related stuff in summer. Empty containers, unused folders, paper, markers end up in my trunk and never make it to a new classroom in good condition.
My biggest desire has always been efficiency. I long for efficiency in my work because I know from my experience about what teaching can deprive you of if you are not careful and conscious about your time and effort.
I think the truth for me with working in summer is I don’t see efficiency in it. I don’t know how a 5-week summer school can add to my toolkit of strategies, routines, activities that will help me survive a new school year.
And lastly, I really do need my summers.
I want the time to experiment, explore my hobbies, try some side gigs that I always feel have the potential to turn into something lucrative. I want to have my time for myself and try to be what I still can’t be while teaching.
I want more freedom, less judgment, less buzz in my head, and anxious minutes before my observations. I want to be totally in control of who I am and what I do.
And that can happen for me only in summer…
I take advantage of the opportunity not to have to work in summer for now. I save for the summer during the year, and make plans to change my life, become a freelancer or a hot blogger/artist/online instructor/copywriter making $100,000 a year.
I do believe summer is my only chance to be bold and not to be afraid to explore, try some courses that are not PD related, and travel to get inspiration to be different here and now.
Should you work in summer as a teacher?
My answer is: ask yourself what you want to experience and how you want to feel; how much you are ready and need to sacrifice. Is teaching giving you everything you dream about? Do you feel happy? Yes, that is the most critical question.
Do you feel satisfied with what you wake up to do every morning? If the answer is “I don’t know,” that tells me you have no idea where you are, and just like me, you need to find yourself.
That’s a great thing to know, indeed. Be honest with yourself. I long ago dropped the idea to pretend I’m a perfect teacher. In fact, I run away from perfectionism to efficiency and balance. And because of that, I’m grateful for my summers.
It’s July.
Most summer schools have already started. I already booked a ticket to the place 12,000 miles away with my family. I am gone with my laptop and a detailed plan to become someone important and happy.
Have a happy day! Keep creating!
Don’t forget to subscribe to Un-SeriousTeacher and connect on Instagram @unseriousteacher.
